Silent Lucidity

I have loved the song Silent Lucidity for decades now, but it’s not a song you heard a lot of on the radio. I’m not even sure where I first heard the song, but I have always loved it. I remember being in Derry a while ago, like before Andrew passed I believe, now that I think about it, it could’ve been 2 months after he passed when we went for his memorial, which would make sense now that I think about it. But I saw the Queensryche CD at our fav goth place in Derry, called Trash, and I was excited to see one of my fav songs on the CD, Silent Lucidity. It’s a hard song to find. Martin hadn’t heard of the band or the song. He wondered where I got the title for this blog from. I informed him that no, I wasn’t that creative, it was the name of a song. But it’s kinda coming together for me tonight though why I love it so much.

Last Friday night while causally strolling through
my FB news feed as I watched Grimm, I saw that someone I knew was front and center at a Queensryche concert. I got the “hit,” the “pull” to look up the Silent  Lucidity video on Youtube, but that wasn’t enough. I “heard” you NEED to see the lyrics! So I knew I had to pull that up too, but not until after I listened to it first. The guitar playing, the music, the singer’s voice, oy! It just sends me places!

So not only does the lead singer’s voice go through me like it always does, it was the 1st 2 lines that got my attention to where I knew the rest of the song would be poignant. The first 2 lines were, “Hush now don’t you cry. Wipe away the tear drop from your eye.” For anyone who has lost a child and is looking to connect with them more, I believe this is the message they want us to know, that when we can move past the pain, we can visit with them through lucid dreaming.

The back story is, since I have decided to move to N Ireland, and have been overwhelmed with all kinds of emotions, and yes, a whole lotta stress, I have begged Andrew to let me feel him by my side to help me cope, especially since Martin isn’t here with me for this big move. I have “thrown” my Faerie cards almost everyday and they say the same thing, all extremely positive. The message every time has been that I need to take time for myself, let go and break free of all the stress and in doing so I will be able to tap into Higher consciousness and my dreams will be coming true. Apparently this 10 year reign of one health trauma after another, and grief are about over! Who couldn’t be happier about that? That’s right! This girl! The thought of even getting relief from the grief and all this stress makes me giddy like a little girl on Christmas morning. Or I should say, giddy as Andrew!

I will be going to N Ireland for 5 weeks first, in Feb before the big move the end of May. Martin and I have been talking about those 5 weeks. He told me that he wants me to focus on my Visionary Art, connecting with Andrew/PureHeart and to decompress, not stress about anything and just be me. So then comes along this song that just affirms everything I have been feeling and wanting to do. It’s as if Andrew is talking right to me in this song. Then I see that it came out when? 1991, the year Andrew was born. It wouldn’t even surprise me if Andrew inspired the writer of this song before Andrew was born! That’s right! That’s how things roll in our world! Some pretty freaky deaky info comes to us and freaky deaky shit happens to us! I know my “woo woo” friends get that one.

Also, as I am going through our life together of the past 28 years, deciding what to take, what to sell and what to “bin it” Derry Speak for garbage, or burn it. I wanted to set the shed on fire and just not deal with it, but the neighbors and probably the city would frown upon that. Anyway, I remember a small wooden plaque with an old looking painting of a unicorn on it that Andrew bought me at a garage sale when he was young. I was sad thinking I had gotten rid of it years ago when once again we were sorting through things as we were planning on moving to So California back in 2005. I thought to myself the other week when I remembered that plaque, if I find this, I KNOW Andrew is right there with me and things ARE moving in the right direction. Well guess what I found as my friend Patty and I were going through my gross shed on Friday? That’s right! That very same wooden unicorn plaque with Andrew’s hand writing on the back. If it weren’t for Patty making me go through the boxes completely, I would have probably lost that unicorn plaque.

So Andrew is making me it quite clear that he is right here, right by my side smiling, loving me, letting me know…..


P.S Martin didn’t write this, I did. I accidentally signed in under him.

Silent Lucidity

Hush now don’t cry
Wipe away the teardrop from your eye
You’re lying safe in bed
It was all a bad dream
Spinning in your head
Your mind tricked you to feel the pain
Of someone close to you leaving the game of life
So here it is, another chance
Wide awake you face the day
Your dream is over
Or has it just begun?

There’s a place I like to hide
A doorway that I run to in the night
Relax child, you were there
But only didn’t realize it and you were scared
It’s a place where you will learn
To face your fears, retrace the years
And ride the whims of your mind
Commanding in another world
Suddenly, you hear and see
This magic new dimension

I will be watching over you
I am gonna help you see it through
I will protect you in the night
I am smiling next to you, in silent lucidity

Visualize your dream
Record it in the present tense
Put it into a permanent form
If you persist in your efforts
You can achieve dream control
Dream control
How’s that then, better?
Dream control
Dream control (hug me)
Dream control
Hug me

If you open your mind for me
You won’t rely on open eyes to see
The walls you built within
Come tumbling down, and a new world will begin

Living twice at once you learn
You’re safe from pain in the dream domain
A soul set free to fly
A round trip journey in your head
Master of illusion, can you realize
Your dream’s alive, you can be the guide but

I will be watching over you
I am gonna help you see it through
I will protect you in the night
I am smiling next to you

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3 Responses to Silent Lucidity

  1. Karen T says:

    I freakin’love this song! How amazing the words for you!

  2. It wasn’t until this past week that the words hit me between the eyes and heart! Now I know why I have loved it so much! Martin and I have been talking a lot about my connection growing with Andrew and that it will be me channeling him. This trip to N Ireland in Feb has been coming up as a very important vacation. AND then song comes back into life. It’s hings you just can’t ignore ;-)

  3. Jacki SeiWell says:

    wishing you the best trip ever and continued health and happiness

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