Shanghai Breezes

Two days ago I was in Walgreens at the pharmacy counter to ask a question. As I am standing there waiting for someone to come to the counter, which no one ever came to, I hear a song and a voice that is familiar to me. I think, “Is that John Denver I hear? That would be weird to hear John Denver in Walgreens.” Then as usual I get that familiar energy that is my boy surrounding me to let me know to pay attention. When I listen to the song, I just remember listening to it while in hospital with Andrew on one of our slumber party nights. It brought me right back to 5 years ago being with Andrew at All Children’s Hospital and how we’d listen to John Denver songs all night long. There was a huge comfort in that for me. When I think back to that time I got to spend with Andrew, even though we were dealing with leukemia, it brings my heart joy. When I think of all the beautiful, intimate moments I got to share with my beloved son before he had to leave, moments that most parents don’t get to share with their teenagers, I am flooded with such love, and joy I could burst!

Now here it is a few days later, and I get the nudge to look up the video and the words to Shanghai Breezes. Andrew has been very active lately with signs for me. Maybe because my birthday is coming up soon, who knows, I’ll take it! He finally turned on his faerie light today, tv came on in the middle of the night last night, numbers galore, and the nudge tonight to look up the video. When I watched the video, and I actually listened to the words, the tears began to well up and fall down my cheeks. Andrew was letting me know that while he lives in my heart now,  I also live in his. It was like he was singing this song to me.

Recently there have been a few people trying to say that I have been holding Andrew back by my grief. First, I’m just not that powerful, if I was, he’d still be here! Yes, a mother’s love is strong, but not strong enough to hold an Avatar back from his Higher Purpose. It is the old paradigm these beliefs come from. What people don’t understand is that on the other side, love is love. The human species definitely likes to measure everything, love, time, distance,etc. We’re just measuring fools. But one love is not greater than the other on the other side. Not even a mothers love. The love on the other side is so magnificent, so much greater than a mother’s love, that we can’t comprehend it. Because if we could comprehend it, we’d not only treat each other better, we’d treat ourselves better. This is what Andrew told me.

Because of people still holding onto this old paradigm, I think Andrew sent me this song to let me know…no worries Pretty Mama It’s All Good. He wanted me to know that the moon and the stars are the same for him as they are for me. And even though we may seem a million miles apart, we live in each others heart, and that has not, nor will it ever change. SO here is the video and the words to the song my beautiful son sent to me the other day to send his love. As our loved ones who have left here live in our hearts, we live in theirs as well! I bolded the versus that really hit me, the ones he really wanted me to feel.

(sorry, but it has a commercial)

[youtube]http://youtu.be/lKd9O7Iszqw[/youtube]

Shanghai Breezes lyrics
John Denver

It’s funny how you sound as if you’re right next door
when you’re really half a world away
I just can’t seem to find the words I’m looking for
to say the things that I want to say
I can’t remember when I felt so close to you
it’s almost more than I can bear
And though I seem a half a million miles from you
you’re in my heart and living there

And the moon and the stars are the same ones you see
it’s the same old sun up in the sky
And your voice in my ear is like heaven to me
like the breezes here in old Shanghai

There are lovers who walk hand in hand in the park
and lovers who walk all alone
There are lovers who lie unafraid in the dark
and lovers who long for home
Oh, I couldn’t leave you even if I wanted to
you’re in my dreams and always near
And especially when I sing the songs I wrote for you
you’re in my heart and living there 

And the moon and the stars are the same ones you see
it’s the same old sun up in the sky
And your face in my dreams is like heaven to me
like the breezes here in old Shanghai

Shanghai breezes cool and clearing
evening’s sweet caress
Shanghai breezes soft and gentle
remind me of your tenderness

And the moon and the stars are the same ones you see
it’s the same old sun up in the sky
And your love in my life is like heaven to me
like the breezes here in old Shanghai

And the moon and the stars are the same ones you see
it’s the same old sun up in the sky
And your love in my life is like heaven to me
like the breezes here in old Shanghai

IT’S ALL GOOD!