Grief is the gift that keeps on giving! Right when you think you have things under control, you get hit. I know this is something I have to live with the rest of my life and that sucks! But all I can do is deal with it as it happens.
I was going along my merry way on Tuesday, when BAM! Right up beside the head with grief. Like I said before, you just never know when it’s gonna strike! Usually I’m home or by myself BUT sometimes it hits you in public.
Tuesday morning was a great morning. Martin and I had fun just hanging out kidding around before he had to be on line to work. I was feeling pretty darn good! I went grocery shopping and since it was cool enough I decided to stop off at Big Lots. IÂ was looking for some sconces for my living room wall, to go on either side of Andrew and Martin’s cd picture we had blown up to 18 inches in diameter for a frame I bought from the antique store.
As I stand in line, I notice the people in front of me. It was a mother with her 12ish year old daughter and her 16-17yo son. I looked at her son and BAM! It hit me! This kid reminded me of Andrew. He was tall and lanky, long fingers, and his energy was just beautiful. It was when the mother leaned against her son the tears started. It reminded me of Andrew and I standing in line together at stores and he’d have his arm around me or I’d lean against him. I was so glad I had my sunglasses on. I cried all the way home, just like the little piggy! I just miss my Muck so much!
BUT it wasn’t just me this week. Elatia had the same moment I did while she was in Vegas. She was at the Excalibur Hotel, the hotel Andrew wanted to go to when he got to go back to Vegas, which never happened. Her friends were in the room at NY NY sleeping. I taught Elatia that sleep is for losers when you’re in Vegas! :-D So she went out and about to different hotels. She ended up at a slot machine at the Excalibur and she got this overwhelming feeling of Andrew that it brought tears to her eyes. It’s a combination of feeling his amazing energy and missing him so. She sat at the slot machine crying. BUT she won $40 at that slot! Nice one Muck!
I was glad that it wasn’t just me this week that had a Muck moment in public.
IT’S ALL GOOD!